# Spencer Sekulin

> Writer | Paramedic | Coffee Connoisseur


## Posts

- [Forgive Yourself for Not Becoming Everything You Wanted](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/10/20/forgive-yourself-for-not-becoming-everything-you-wanted/): Part of growing up and growing older is making peace with what you didn’t become.
- [No One Wants to Remain a Prisoner in an Unlived Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/05/18/no-one-wants-to-remain-a-prisoner-in-an-unlived-life/): It’s risky to pursue your dreams, but it’s deadly to not pursue them at all.
- [The Less We Live in the Moment, the Less We Live.](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/05/03/the-less-we-live-in-the-moment-the-less-we-live/): Wherever you are, be there.
- [Make Good on Your Life, Especially in Difficult Times](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/04/19/make-good-on-your-life-especially-in-difficult-times/): No matter what happens, never underestimate your ability to choose how you face it.
- [Don’t let what they did to you turn you against yourself](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/03/09/dont-let-what-they-did-to-you-turn-you-against-yourself/): You can always rediscover your inner beauty, but you must first not lose faith that it was there all along.
- [Let Your Impermanence Inspire You](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/03/02/let-your-impermanence-inspire-you/): Thanks to impermanence, everything is possible.
- [The Miserable Cycle of More](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/02/22/the-miserable-cycle-of-more/): Respect your desire for more, but also tame it.
- [Handle Your Emotions, Instead Of Letting Them Handle You](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/02/16/handle-your-emotions-instead-of-letting-them-handle-you/): Unpleasant emotions are not bad. Runaway emotions are.
- [The Thereness of Things](https://spencersekulin.net/2025/01/04/the-thereness-of-things/): Suddenly, we see life for what it is. Fleeting. Fragile. Fearful. Yet wonderful.
- [Instead of running from regret, embrace it as the revelatory tool it is](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/11/20/instead-of-running-from-regret-embrace-it-as-the-revelatory-tool-it-is/): Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow, but tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh.
- [You’re More Courageous Than You Think](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/11/11/youre-more-courageous-than-you-think/): There are secret sources of courage inside every human heart.
- [This Whole Impermanence](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/10/17/this-whole-impermanence/): Everything changes.
- [The Last Time](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/08/14/the-last-time/): “Life, it is thanks to death that you are precious in my eyes.” Seneca When we are young and healthy, we think we have time. Even when we are not so young and healthy, we tend to gloss over the finiteness of life, thinking that the end is still far over the horizon — that what we are doing right now will be done for many days to come. Yet if we pause and look back on the things we used to do, aren’t there so many we’ve not done in ages? Hasn’t so much of life already fallen along the wayside? […]
- [Making The Best Of Things](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/06/05/making-the-best-of-things/): When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.
- [The Shattering of Things](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/04/02/the-shattering-of-things/): Eventually, you learn to breathe again.
- [Endings and Beginnings](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/01/11/endings-and-beginnings/): Here's to new endings, and here’s to new beginnings.
- [Learning To Live With Ourselves](https://spencersekulin.net/2024/01/11/learning-to-live-with-ourselves/): They say treat others as you would like yourself to be treated. Treat yourself the way you would like others to treat you, too.
- [The Paths We Cross](https://spencersekulin.net/2023/12/05/the-paths-we-cross/): We meet no ordinary people in our lives.
- [Forgive Yourself](https://spencersekulin.net/2023/04/03/forgive-yourself/): One of the hardest things in life is learning to forgive yourself, yet it is also one of the most important lessons to learn.
- [Keep Dreaming](https://spencersekulin.net/2023/03/26/keep-dreaming/): A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.
- [Avoid The Traps That May Derail Your Journey Through Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/11/21/avoid-the-traps-that-may-derail-your-journey-through-life/): One of the best tools you can bring in life is courage.
- [When You See No Way Forward, Look Back](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/09/21/when-you-see-no-way-forward-look-back/): There are times to forget, and there are times to remember.
- [Tomorrow Will Arrive](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/09/09/tomorrow-will-arrive/): Don’t let what happened today defeat you.
- [7 Critical Lessons for a Better Life — According to a Paramedic](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/08/15/7-critical-lessons-for-a-better-life-according-to-a-paramedic/): Important takeaways from the emergency medical field that anyone can use to improve their lives today.
- [How Many Chances Have You Been Given?](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/07/07/how-many-chances-have-you-been-given/): There are only so many tomorrows.
- [Choose Your Journey](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/07/01/choose-your-journey/): Your life may not be a blank page, but there is still room to write.
- [Embrace Your Inherent Imperfection](https://spencersekulin.net/2022/03/10/embrace-your-inherent-imperfection/): Life need not be an eternal war with yourself. You can choose to celebrate life, and your own imperfection, every single day. You’re human.
- [What Being A Paramedic Taught Me About Living, Dying, And What Really Matters](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/10/05/what-being-a-paramedic-taught-me-about-living-dying-and-what-really-matters/): The world looks different from the back of an ambulance.
- [Will Today Be The Day You Finally Change Your Life?](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/09/01/will-today-be-the-day-you-finally-change-your-life/): The only time you can change your destiny is now.
- [Give This Gift To Everyone You Meet Today](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/09/01/give-this-gift-to-everyone-you-meet-today/): Everyone you meet today needs a little kindness.
- [8 Pillars of a Satisfied and Happy Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/06/26/8-pillars-of-a-satisfied-and-happy-life/): Depth of life matters more than its length.
- [One Day Your World Will Stop](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/06/26/one-day-your-world-will-stop/): How will you live before that time comes?
- [Don’t Miss Life While Chasing After Success](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/05/05/dont-miss-life-while-chasing-after-success/): Some of life’s greatest pleasures are already around you, and most are simple and absolutely free.
- [A Case for Tragic Optimism: Making Good Out of Life’s Ingredients, Even the Bitter Ones.](https://spencersekulin.net/2021/04/02/a-case-for-tragic-optimism-making-good-out-of-lifes-ingredients-even-the-bitter-ones/): There is a duality to life, and by nature all things: Love and hate Joy and sorrow Darkness and light Life and death Good and evil Some people focus on one side over another, but that doesn’t mean it’s not there — or that it won’t affect them. The business of living is not an easy thing, nor is it always pleasant. Life has, as Viktor Frankl derived from logotherapy, a tragic triad, aspects of the human existence that cannot be escaped: pain, guilt, and death. It is tempting to take a pessimist’s view of life. To fall into the apparent meaninglessness of it, […]
- [Make Every Day Its Own Victory, And You’ll Reap A Victorious Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/06/28/make-every-day-its-own-victory-and-youll-reap-a-victorious-life/): Your life is made of your days, and each day is a brick in the foundation of your success. “The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.” Abraham Lincoln Life is how we look at it. It can be an overwhelming task, all those months and years looming with all of the goals and dreams you wish to weave into them. And in this day and age, most people live in the future, live in anticipation, live in a constant state of getting ready, planning, thinking, to the point that following through is hard. It’s […]
- [Fail Upwards: How You Treat Your Failures Will Determine Whether You Succeed.](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/04/08/fail-upwards-how-you-treat-your-failures-will-determine-whether-you-succeed/): Failure is not only an option, but a necessity — and so is your proper reaction to it. “Successful people don’t fear failure, but understand that it’s necessary to learn and grow from.” Robert T. Kiyosaki YOU WILL FAIL There, glad that’s over with. It’s true though, you will fail. I will fail. We will fail. That is inevitable. Failure is part of life, just like breathing, eating, and sleeping. It’s endemic to existing — and if that’s the case, why do we treat it with such fear and hatred? More importantly, why do most people grind themselves into the dirt when […]
- [11 Timeless Lessons From Epictetus That Will Change How You See Your Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/03/29/11-timeless-lessons-from-epictetus-that-will-change-how-you-see-your-life/): Eternal life advice from one of the greatest stoic philosophers . . . “No man is free who is not master of himself.”  Epictetus Self-mastery doesn’t require magic bullets. If anything, it necessitates the timeless wisdom and eternal lessons that have survived the ages.  Mastery requires tools that have stood the test of time. Some lessons never change. Some applied just as much in the golden age of the Roman Empire as they do today — and those are the most important lessons of all. They come from people of all positions, all backgrounds, all callings, from someone as elevated as the Roman emperor Marcus […]
- [14 Powerful Lessons From Rome’s Greatest Leader](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/03/25/14-powerful-lessons-from-romes-greatest-leader/): How to tackle life with the mindset of an emperor. “It takes a wise man to learn from his mistakes, but an even wiser man to learn from others.” Zen Proverb The past is a school, but it need not be our own past that we learn from. We can learn from others who came before us, be it yesterday or centuries ago. Marcus Aurelius, the last of the five good emperors and one of the greatest stoic philosophers, did what most successful people do today: he kept a journal, and in it, he wrote lessons and admonishments that are now compiled […]
- [The Coronavirus Pandemic Sucks, But It’s Also An Opportunity To Grow](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/03/19/the-coronavirus-pandemic-sucks-but-its-also-an-opportunity-to-grow/): Hard times are an opportunity to exercise your greatest strengths, and to foster your highest self. “Hard times build determination and inner strength. Through them we can also come to appreciate the uselessness of anger.”  Dalai Lama Life, and all the hardships therein, are only what we make of them. Hard times are part of the seasons of life, be they recessions, lost loved ones, lost opportunities, sickness, or coronavirus pandemics — and that’s okay. Time and time again they come — and will come — and time and time again we are faced with an opportunity. We’ve all seen the toilet paper pandemonium. We’ve all heard the […]
- [Nothing Will Change Until You Deliberately Change](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/03/11/nothing-will-change-until-you-deliberately-change/): Conscious change is the only sure way to bring more good things into your life. “Nothing will change until we change — until we throw off our dependence and act for ourselves.” Myles Horton Change is the only constant in this world — but conscious positive change is not. Most people let change sweep them along, but they do not make a decision to change themselves, to make the difference within that will bring about the lives they want. What do you want to change in your life? Your finances? Your relationships? Your creativity? Your productivity? Your health? Your mindfulness? […]
- [Your Focus Is Only As Valuable As What You Spend It On](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/02/16/your-focus-is-only-as-valuable-as-what-you-spend-it-on/): Today Not everything deserves your focus today, but everything will demand it anyway. Protect it. “The things you think about determine the quality of your mind. Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts.”  Marcus Aurelius We live in an age of distraction. We also live in an age that reputes focus as the new IQ. Is that just a coincidence? Not only is focus essential, focus creates our realities. Marcus Aurelius, one of the greatest Roman emperors and stoic philosophers, was right in saying that our thoughts shape us. Our focus shapes us too, for better or for worse. […]
- [Life Throws These Two Things At You Every Single Day — Your Success Depends On How You Use Them](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/02/01/life-throws-these-two-things-at-you-every-single-day%e2%80%8a-%e2%80%8ayour-success-depends-on-how-you-use-them/): The two eternal sides of life’s daily allotment . . . “Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle.”  Napoleon Hill Success has never been an easy thing. But neither has it ever been so complicated that it cannot be grasped. The formula for success is simple, but its accomplishment is hard, very hard, and is never a matter to take lightly. Yet there is one thing about success that we all know: that’s it is humanly possible, and therefore is possible for you and I.  Part of this journey to a higher expression of the self is taking what we’re given […]
- [Feeling Their Absence: A Stoic’s Guide To Mourning Those We’ve Lost](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/01/20/feeling-their-absence-a-stoics-guide-to-mourning-those-weve-lost-2/): Seneca’s heartfelt letter to a mourning friend and what we can learn from it. All of us will lose someone, just as all of us will be lost by someone else one day. It is a universal affliction that all of us shall face. The loss of someone we love. When we experience the passing of a friend we held so dear, we feel as if we’ve lost an integral part of ourselves. How are we to handle these times when they arise? All differ in their perception and handling of grief, but if there is one thing we may […]
- [Making It Through Hard Times — A Stoic’s Guide](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/01/18/making-it-through-hard-times-a-stoics-guide/): Seneca’s heartfelt advice to a hurting friend. Life is no easy matter. Wherever you are right now, and wherever you’re going, there will be hardship. There will be pain. There will be suffering. There will be loss. There will be times when the urge to give up is almost overwhelming. There will be nights when you can’t sleep, and toss about for hours. . . and mornings where you wish you could stay in bed and not face the world. This is our destiny — to venture into the darkness, in search of light. Life is no easy matter, especially when you […]
- [7 Wonderful Things to Remember This New Year](https://spencersekulin.net/2020/01/13/7-wonderful-things-to-remember-this-new-year/): The new year will only ever be what you make of it, and these seven reminders are here to help . . . “New year — a new chapter, new verse, or just the same old story? Ultimately we write it. The choice is ours.” Alex Morritt On the cusp of yet another new year, we are faced with the meeting of our past and our future — for where this year ends, another begins, and so begins yet another leg in our journey through life. And it will only be what we make of it, what we bring to it. No […]
- [How To Deal With Passive-Aggressive Colleagues by Akachi Obijiaku](https://spencersekulin.net/2019/12/18/how-to-deal-with-passive-aggressive-colleagues-by-akachi-obijiaku/): Whenever you speak with a passive aggressive person, don’t you kind of want to hold them firmly and give them a good shake? A shake that screams “snap out of it!”. I know I do … But oftentimes we’re in the office, so we can’t (or rather we really shouldn’t). So what exactly is passive-aggressive behaviour? And if you find yourself with a person who exhibits such behaviour, how do you respond? According to Long, Long & Whitson (2017), passive aggression is a deliberate and masked way of expressing feelings of anger. A passive-aggressive person will often not exhibit resistance to […]
- [At Every Moment You Must Make This Choice, For Better Or For Worse. What Are You Choosing?](https://spencersekulin.net/2019/12/18/at-every-moment-you-must-make-this-choice-for-better-or-for-worse-what-are-you-choosing/): An ode to the importance of choice in transitory life, and the essence of our responsibility in this fleeting world . . . How long have you lived? How long do you have left? The first we know, the second is a mystery. We don’t know how long we have, nor do we have the closure of knowing what will become of us. That is part of life’s journey — to venture into the unknown, every day, towards a future that is nigh a glimmer in our minds. I will be blunt, because all truth is blunt in a sense. This is nothing new. This […]
- [Hope In The Holocaust: Why You’re So Much Stronger Than You Think, Even When It Hurts To Live](https://spencersekulin.net/2019/12/02/hope-in-the-holocaust-why-youre-so-much-stronger-than-you-think-even-when-it-hurts-to-live/): When all is dark, when times are trying, and when part of you just wants to give in, what’s the reaction? What’s your response? Most people become smaller, they become less, they break, not by some outward will imposed on them, but by choice.
- [What Does Leadership Look Like? by Akachi Obijiaku](https://spencersekulin.net/2019/11/25/what-does-leadership-look-like-by-akachi-obijiaku/): Leadership is not a position. Leadership is a behaviour.
- [Doubt You Can Succeed? You’re Absolutely Right](https://spencersekulin.net/2019/11/08/doubt-you-can-succeed-youre-absolutely-right/): This is the force that shapes your destiny . . . “Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy.” ~Anthony Robbins Where you are right now is, for the most part, the result of what you believe. About the world About people About success About money About effort About Yourself Proven Fact: Our beliefs shape our reality. What else can there be than that? Our perceptions are formed on what we think is true, not what really is! People once thought that smearing mercury all over themselves healed many ailments. Guess what? People did it — and it proved effectively fatal. And it’s […]
- [The Pain You Feel Today Is The Joy You’ll Feel Tomorrow](https://spencersekulin.net/2019/10/23/the-pain-you-feel-today-is-the-joy-youll-feel-tomorrow/): Pain will always be part of your success story . . . “Pain has its own noble joy, when it starts a strong consciousness of life, from a stagnant one.” ~John Sterling Life is painful. Are you alive right now? Is your heart beating? Then welcome to life, and welcome to pain. That sounds pessimistic, but it’s the truth. Everyone will feel pain in life. No one avoids it, because it’s part of being a living thing and, more importantly, a part of being human. The question is not whether you will feel pain. The real question, and a deciding factor in how your […]
- [Here's the Formula for Success](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/11/05/heres-the-formula-for-success/): Success is simple — it’s just not  easy. Success is not an accident. It happens for a reason, because of the things put into it. It is the result of a consistent, deliberate process. And it’s nothing new. I find that literature exemplifies this perfectly. Whether one reads the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius, or a fresh copy of Tony Robbin’s Awaken the Giant Within, we come across the same ideas about what it takes to succeed. The major ingredients of success are universal and eternal — and they are available to everyone.     The Breakdown Thoughts ~ “As you think, so shall you […]
- [How To Stop Being Your Own Worst Enemy](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/10/28/how-to-stop-being-your-own-worst-enemy/): “You are your only problem, and you are your only solution.” ~Howard  Rankin You have a dream for your life, a vision you want to make real. Chances are it’s a big goal, a massive challenge, something that will demand every ounce of your strength, persistence, tenacity and passion. You know it won’t be easy. Other people will say it’s impossible — you can ignore them. Challenges will rise in your path — you can surmount them. Failures will build up along the way — you can learn from them. There are countless external things that will try to stop you from living your dream. And […]
- [Making the Most of It](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/06/02/making-the-most-of-it/): When we live in the moment, we live indeed. Whenever we set out to do things beyond the norm, like taking a trip or going to a concert, it’s often that we resolve to “make the most of it,” and that is all well and good. It is essential to make the most of uncommon happenings. But at the same time it implies that the ordinary, the regular routines of life, are not worthy of such regard–that we can simply drift through them, do the motions, get by, merely DO rather than BE. We tell ourselves to be present when […]
- [When I Hold Myself](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/04/30/when-i-hold-myself/): During my hospital clinical placement I was able to stay in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) one morning. I was given the honor to see, assess, and care for the most beautiful and precious little ones I have ever seen. They were so small, so new to this world. I saw, and held, the future, these lives at the start of their journey. Watching them sleep, dream, and breathe, hearing their little hearts beating, touched me so deeply. Such purity! Such beautiful fragility! I found myself in awe, struck to tears even, by the simple fact of their existence. […]
- [Confidence](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/04/19/confidence/): Don’t overthink how to get “confidence.” The process is natural and simple. You only start to believe you are confident when you begin taking action. Act as if you are already confident and your mind will believe you. We’ve all heard of “fake it ’till you make it,” and the surprising reality is that there’s truth to that idiom. Your mind only believes what you tell it. It doesn’t know the difference between reality and dreams, between a million and a dollar, it merely receives what you send it. Much of confidence is in physical carrying–stand straight, smile, adopt a […]
- [Resisting VS Replacing Bad Habits](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/04/19/resisting-vs-replacing-bad-habits/): It is a common method to try and resist a bad habit. To try to not think about it. Trying to “push” it away, to block it out when its temptation arrives. But in most cases it is clear that the more we try to NOT think about something, the more we end up thinking about it–and that mentality leads to the habit winning, for THOUGHTS naturally translate into ACTION. This is called “Ironic Process Theory,” stating that trying to change bad habits by resisting them will inevitably fail. Thought suppression has counterproductive effects on behavior. As Carl Jun said: […]
- [Ben Franklin's Principles of Success](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/04/16/ben-franklins-principles-of-success/): Benjamin Franklin (January 17, 1706 – April 17, 1790) was an American polymath and one of the Founding Fathers of the United States. He is widely known as being a leading author, printer, political theorist, politician, freemason, postmaster, scientist, inventor, humorist, civic activist, statesman, and diplomat. As a scientist, he was a major figure in the American Enlightenment and the history of physics for his discoveries and theories regarding electricity. Such a level of achievement is rarely seen, but it is precisely this sort of person that shows everyone else what is truly possible. Known for all these things, it […]
- [From Loneliness to Love](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/29/from-loneliness-to-love/): We’re all searching for meaning, and a great part of meaning is to be meaningful to others. It is in our nature to desire connection with others. It is programmed, innate, and its fruition is a matter of great importance to our psychology. Loneliness is, in many ways, a lethal companion. In this day and age it would seem that we are more enabled than ever, with technology having made the world small, to connect with others and fulfill our social inclinations. Yet there is an epidemic of loneliness in the very places that are so crammed together by technology […]
- [Marcus Aurelius on Worry and the Thoughts of Others](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/21/marcus-aurelius-on-worry-and-the-thoughts-of-others/): The great Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius (121AD – 180AD) is recognized for his philosophical meditations, setting him apart from many rulers of that age. Last of the Five Good Emperors, his death was considered the end of the Pax Romana, and marked the beginning of the eventual fall of the Western Roman Empire. Yet even in death he impacts the world with his writings which, carried on to today, speak the timeless truths about living and dying in this transient, brutal world. Worry is a universal, ageless human ailment. We especially, fearing rejection and failure, are worried about what others […]
- [Diseases of Attitude](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/19/a-pledge-against-the-diseases-of-attitude/): Attitude is, as the old adage goes, altitude–and so much more. As Jim Rohn put forth in his seminars, there are numerous pathologies of the mind that can wreck all our chances to do well. Below are a few of the most evident ones. This is my own personal pledge against them, inspired by the above’s ideas on the matter and catalyzed by my own dissatisfaction with my attitude. I hope it provides some benefit to you too. Diseases of Attitude Poor attitudes, like poor thinking, are like weeds in a garden. They are part of life, for negative, like […]
- [A Pledge Against Procrastination](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/12/a-pledge-against-procrastination/): Procrastination is a slow rot that eats away at the foundations of every good initiative one starts. Not doing something today thinking that tomorrow I will have the time is foolish–there is no time but now, so do not put things off. The road to “someday” leads to a place called NOWHERE. And how many countless people end up there! Thus, I will not delay actions I can take today. I will start the things I want to create, not when I think I am ready, but now–I will learn along the way. Be it a book, be it a […]
- [Thoughts on Doing Your Best](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/08/thoughts-on-doing-your-best/): The feeling that comes when you know you’re doing all that you can. When you know that you’re applying yourself wholly to a task, to a mission, to a goal. Anything less and the seeds of doubt and that ominous feeling take hold–that lurking knowledge that you’re doing less, that you’re settling for less, that you are less than you can be. The solution is simple, but that does not mean it is easy. It’s hard to pour it on. It takes persistence, it takes patience, and demands that utmost sincerity of focus. Yet it is like most things: difficult […]
- [Remaining Calm Under Pressure](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/04/remaining-calm-under-pressure/): Here are three ideas on functioning effectively while under pressure. Avoid the Rabbit Hole: Stop and do a threat assessment. Ignore the “What Ifs” and recall a similar problem you have dealt with. Leverage prior experience to calmly size up the challenge. The key is to deliberately catch yourself, stop, and do this–to not let the pressure send you down that rabbit hole of racing thoughts, which only leads to panic. Reframe the Situation: Emphasize the positive and focus on what you can control. Driving a car, for example, does not faze you (assuming you are a regular driver), because […]
- [Here's What's Stopping You From Succeeding In Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/04/heres-whats-stopping-you-from-succeeding-in-life/): Yourself. Not the economy, not society, not traffic, not the weather, not the government, not your negative relatives, not any circumstances. Just you. But here’s the simple answer: you would be hard pressed to change what is outside of you, but it is perfectly in your power to change what is within you. In the end, it is a good thing that you are the key to your better future, because you can change. And when you change, everything changes for you. That’s it.
- [Stay The Course](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/03/02/stay-the-course/): Life is hard. All of human history has been opportunity and adversity mixed in an endless whirlpool of change. So, too, with our lives today. There is much to be seized as our own, and there is much standing in our way. We invariably choose a path. Our youth is filled with dreams and desires, bottomless ambition, a yearning to become. And when we progress onward we embark on that road. But how easy it is to be swept off it! No road is easier to stray from than that road of rightness, that course you have set to your […]
- [Thoughts on Fear](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/02/27/fear-2/): Fear is like a gossamer veil. It distorts what we see, but at the same time it is often light enough to remain beneath our awareness. Oftentimes we do not understand that a situation, an opportunity, or a change is not in itself a terrible thing, that the reason we feel so repelled, so unwilling to face it, is due to the simple presence of fear. Fear of what? We are afraid of many things, but the vast majority of those fears were not with us at birth. We created them ourselves. Our fears are what we make of them. […]
- [Seneca on Activity, Fear, Self-Love, Death, and Enduring Suffering](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/02/25/seneca-on-activity-fear-self-love-death-and-enduring-suffering/): All of us can stand to gain from musing on the thoughts echoed through the ages, the ideas passed on, immortal ideas, the gifts of those who came before us and were students enough of life to not only think, but be generous with their thoughts. It is one of the greatest gifts of all. On Activity ~ A delight in bustling about is not industry–it is only the restless energy of a hunted mind. And the state of mind that looks on all activity as tiresome is not true repose, but a spineless inertia. Some men have shrunk so […]
- [Seneca On Taking Care of One's Spirit](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/02/23/seneca-on-taking-care-of-ones-spirit/): See, then, that the spirit is well looked after. Our thoughts and our words proceed from it. We derive our demeanor and expression and the very way we walk from it. If the spirit is sound and healthy, our style will be firm and forceful and virile, but if the spirit stumbles all the rest of our personality comes down in ruins with it. “The queen unharmed, the bees all live at one. Once she is lost, the hive’s in anarchy.” The spirit is our queen. So long as she is unharmed, the rest remains at its post, obedient and […]
- [Madeleine L'Engle on Self and Being](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/02/21/madeleine-lengle-on-self-and-being/): “The great thing about getting older is that you don’t lose all the other ages you’ve been.” Madeleine L’Engle, an American writer who wrote young adult fiction, including A Wrinkle in Time and its sequels, put forth a wonderful reflection on self and being in her book, Glimpses of Grace. Below is an abbreviated portion that I think is particularly worth sharing. I haven’t defined a self, nor do I want to. A self is not something static, tied up in a pretty parcel and handed to the child, finished and complete. A self is always becoming. Being does mean […]
- [Learn from Everyone](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/02/20/learn-from-everyone/): The formal education is something that has been given a lot more credence than other ways of acquiring knowledge, the focus on curriculum and standardized methods of learning overshadowing all else. This does not detract from the importance of these methods. Schooling is not a bad thing, and one can learn plenty in a formal education, although only as much as they are willing to learn. The process towards earning a degree, a diploma, or a certificate, is what you make of it, not what it makes of you. In this age of competition, one must often have proof of […]
- [Fear](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/01/27/fear/): Fear is pervasive, and it is the major paradigm that holds most back in life: fear of failure, fear of criticism, fear of rejection, and so on. Fear cannot be escaped. It is human. But what every person has the power to do, whether they believe it or not, is to evaluate their fear and choose not to let it alter their course. It takes emotional intelligence, mindfulness, to catch fear and see it for what it really is. Ultimately fear makes most people give up, usually in the form of a perceived “failure.” The bottom line is this: never […]
- [Keep Going](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/01/07/keep-going/): Persistent people recognize and sweep aside the weaknesses which stand between them and their goals. Their persistence develops into a respected, progressive power. Without persistence, we are defeated even before we start. With persistence and strong desire and consistent action we will win. Be the one who takes the pain of defeat and uses it as an urge to greater effort! For Fortune acknowledges talent, recognizes genius, but only pays off after one has refused to quit. Do. Not. Quit. Instead, force adversity, obstacles, and all the trials Fortune throws at you to give up. Make Fortune say, “Aw what’s […]
- [Letting Go, and Becoming](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/01/06/letting-go-and-becoming/): It takes guts to form the right habits, to stay true to them despite all the things that life does to try and pull us away. Here is one way to look at success habits: Devise – consciously decide what you yearn to become more of. Expectation – seeing yourself in the possession of or having accomplished that desire. Activity – action towards it every day. Do those three daily and it will form a habit, and once you form a habit the process becomes innate and effortless. But remember: “Action is the evidence of your expectation! To expect is […]
- [Your Opponent is Time](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/01/02/your-opponent-is-time/): We face many challenges in life, the foes of our success numerous and varied, but far greater than all of them is time–for time is the one obstacle we can never hope to defeat. Each of us only have so many mornings to rise to, so many days to live out, and so many nights to lay our heads down to sleep. It matters not whether we are conscious of it. Time passes by with model persistence, and it will, always, until it has pulled down every grain of sand in the hourglass of life. We cannot fight that, but […]
- [Anew](https://spencersekulin.net/2018/01/01/anew/): On the eve of this new year, let us remember that there is nothing more valuable or filled with potential than this very moment. We make resolutions on this eve, lofty promises and goals, and yet more often than not they fall along the wayside soon thereafter. And it is because we have let the things that plague us grow too large, that we do not notice them until we arrive at the end of another precious year of our lives, that we so haphazardly try to throw together a response. It is far better, instead of just doing it […]
- [For Every Choice You Make, Ask This Simple Question . . .](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/12/31/for-every-choice-you-make-ask-this-simple-question/): Our motivations drive our actions, yet so often we are blind to what are motivations really are–and whether they are truly good for us. Get in the habit of asking yourself for every dilemma, every relationship, every commitment, or every failure to commit: Does this choice diminish me or enlarge me? Every choice we make, every action we take, has an influence on who and what we are–for better or for worse. What we eat in the morning, the dilemma of committing to a workout or enjoying the lethargy of a day off, the choice of who we spend our […]
- [True Silence](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/26/true-silence/): We all know what it’s like to sit in a library or classroom or some other public space and try to concentrate there. We all know the people who turn their heads at every noise, who lift their eyes from their books whenever someone talks, whenever a mere pin drops. Maybe that is ourselves. And so, too, do we know the ones who stand through all the public chaos unruffled, undisturbed, capable of focusing on their tasks without being pulled this way and that by mere distractions. What can be said about this? Seneca, the Roman stoic philosopher, had much […]
- [Be Good To Yourself](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/25/be-good-to-yourself/): It is not easy, the path we tread. The road is long and winding, treacherous indeed, and sometimes we tire so much that we cannot think of moving on. Do not reject such difficulty, but do not chide yourself for feeling this weariness either. We are all finite beings, although infinite in potential. All people, even the greatest, get tired and feel uncertainty. So as you feel now, in this life of constant change, do not despair and do not embitter yourself. Instead, be good to yourself. Take a step back and appreciate all that you have done, and take […]
- [When Others Wrong You](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/22/when-others-wrong-you/): The subconscious mind is like a wellspring, bringing forth the water we drink. From the depths it comes, unseen, until it manifests itself on the surface. So, too, are our minds the wellsprings of our actions, of our perceptions, and many other aspects of our lives. Marcus Aurelius, Roman philosopher and emperor, wrote incessantly about the importance of thought and the dangers of misperception. And he, like most of us, had to deal with unpleasant people. When we are wronged by others our anger and instincts tell us to respond, usually in an equally unkind manner–we take offense, and we […]
- [Seneca - The Balance of Activity and Leisure](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/18/seneca-the-balance-of-activity-and-leisure/): Western society is a hive of activity, of rushing and going, of nonstop motion. Humanity has never been more driven about, so bombarded by information and spurred to often senseless action, and what this gives us is often an illusion of activity, an illusion of productivity. But are we really going anywhere? As the Roman philosopher Seneca noted many centuries ago, in the then bustling society of Rome, rushing about and the love thereof is often as fruitless as standing still, and he conversely addressed the disdain for activity–the two extremes on the activity spectrum. Both of these he views […]
- [Tao Te Ching ~ Lao Tzu's Simple Yet Revealing Statements on Character](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/16/tao-te-ching-lao-tzus-simple-yet-revealing-statements-on-character/): Laozi was an ancient Chinese philosopher and writer, known as the reputed author of the Tao Te Ching. He is seen as the founder of philosophical Taoism. His work has been immortalized through the ages, and much of it stands today as a timeless reminder of what it means to live full to one’s potential and character. The following lines, taken from Tao Te Ching (Book One, XXXIII), are an example of this. He who knows others is clever, He who knows himself has discernment. We all know that it is easier to look at others and scrutinize them–we do […]
- [The Fine Line Between Creating and Copying](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/15/the-fine-line-between-creating-and-copying/): All art is imitation to some extent. We are inspired by the works of others, by nature itself, or by countless other things that may draw our attention and enamor us with their example. There is no such thing as complete originality, for no matter what we do we draw upon that which has shaped us–a painter drawing upon the artists he studied, a writer upon the books she read and loved the most, a musician upon the styles that inspired him to create music himself, and so on. It is an unconscious process. We do not go about creating […]
- [Contentment - Happiness in an Unhappy World](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/14/contentment-happiness-in-an-unhappy-world/): We all know what contentment means–or at least we think we do. It is such a simple concept. To be content is to be happy with what one has, to look upon his or her life and feel no envy, no bitterness, but simply a calm acceptance of what is and an elation of all the blessings therein. It is the goal of every human being, whether they know it or not, because the only reason we strive forward is because we see our present state as being not enough, of being insufficient to our ambitions–we see something in the […]
- [Readings From Seneca - Part 1 - The Futility of Running Away](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/13/readings-from-seneca-part-1-the-futility-of-running-away/): You cannot run away from yourself . . . For several years of his life, Seneca (c. 4 BC – AD 64) was the guiding hand of the Roman Empire. His timeless writings, which are well portrayed in Letters from a Stoic, were derived mainly from Stoic principles, which had been developed centuries earlier in Athens. In his letters one can see Seneca’s interpretations of the austere ethical ideals of Stoicism, wherein his wit and humanity reveal a moving and inspiring declaration of the dignity of the individual mind. Stoicism, by definition, is the approach to life in which one, […]
- [When You Wake Up In The Morning, Remember This . . .](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/12/when-you-wake-up-in-the-morning-remember-this/): Remember that this moment is all that you have. That your future is yet to come, and your past is finished. It is only now, this very instant, that is yours to shape to your will–or to let others shape it to theirs. All of your dreams, all of your goals, everything you desire, it all depends on what you do with the moments measured out to you. Despite all your planning, all your thought, all your words about what you will do, none of it means anything unless you actually act. And the time for action is now and […]
- [It Doesn't Always Have To Be All Or Nothing](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/11/it-doesnt-always-have-to-be-all-or-nothing/): We do all we can, we do the best we can, but some days we wake up and we’re behind, and things are not on time, and it feels as though our routines and plans are coming undone. Do not despair. Instead, do what you can, get done what you can, and keep going. Even if you have lot half the day to neglect, you can still take the other half and make of it what you will. Even if all you have is an hour, you can change your course–you can turn over a new leaf any time you […]
- [The First Fall of Snow](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/10/the-first-fall-of-snow/): “The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of a world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment then where is it to be found?” J. B. Priestley Today the first snow fell, and as Priestley said, it is indeed an event. Beyond the beauty, beyond the calm it brings by dampening noise, and beyond the hints of a season to come, it also brings an undeniable link to the past–to the childhood, when it was a blessing rather than […]
- [Arnold Bennett on Time and Living a Meaningful Life](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/09/arnold-bennett-on-time-and-living-a-meaningful-life/): There is nothing more valuable than time. All other things spring from it, and all things shall bend to it, even the stars. Yet in this day and age we worry about money and other tangibles and neglect our greatest possession of all, which is our time. And like an hourglass, each second, each moment, is a grain of sand from the top–the time we have yet to live–going through the narrow point–the present–and falling eternally to the bottom–the past. We cannot get back a second of what we have lived. Yet we care so much more about getting back […]
- [On Perception](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/08/on-perception/): “Things have no hold on the soul. They standing unmoving, outside it. Disturbances come only from within–from our own perceptions . . . The world is nothing but change. Our life is only perception.” The words of Marcus Aurelius always touch me, and these in particular. I find that life is chaos when we let the world affect us unchecked. We wake up every day and are bombarded with information, most of it negative, and for the unguarded mind it is like heat onto delicate grass–it sucks it dry. The mind is the most powerful tool in the world. It […]
- [When We Fail](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/08/when-we-fail/): Failure happens. It happened then, it happened now–I am not surprised. I saw it coming, even, in the way I thought, in how I ended up so twisted into a cycle of unraveling perceptions, all false, all poison. It is not that I failed that is what disturbs me, but the mechanism–how easy it was. I have done wrong enough times in the past. I have wronged myself. But I would have thought that after so long, after beginning this journey over a year ago, I would at least be strong enough to face these things as they are, to […]
- [Adversity](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/07/adversity/): It is difficult. I understand. We all face trials, we all face things that break us either in part or in full. It is a human thing, to face extraordinary challenges, for our pursuits, by nature of their higher purpose, also bring with them higher risk and greater potential for reward or calamity. It’s an economy of scale. But that should not deter any of us. With the adversity you are facing now, do not despair any more than is reasonable. What matters most, and what will always matter most, is not what happens, but what we do about what […]
- [When All Seems Lost](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/06/when-all-seems-lost/): We all arrive at a point in our lives when everything seems to be on the verge of oblivion. Jobs fail, families collapse, economies crumble, relationships end, health deteriorates . . . there are many things that may make you feel like your rope is short and you’re at its end. And it is easy, so easy, to give in to the feelings of helplessness–to give up, to conceded. Because giving up is easy. It offers the false comfort of motionlessness, of not having to try, of wallowing in the comfort of melancholy which, in its odd nature, lulls us […]
- [The Importance of Stopping](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/05/the-importance-of-stopping/): This world is at breakneck pace. Society is churning like a whirlpool, its influence tugging us always towards is tumultuous center, always away from the calm waters at its edge. And for the most part one must go with it, to face the world and life and take risks and GO FOR IT. But at times, and this really is the key, we must step back, put a stopper on the relentless pursuits we are caught up in, and simply be there, in that moment to stillness. We get used to inertia. We become unaware of just how headlong our […]
- [Looking Inward](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/03/looking-inward/): Often we are confronted with unpleasant realities. The world is a place of constant change and turmoil, and thanks to the digital society’s obsession with the negative, it is almost natural to drift into a state of helplessness about the world, about life; to let the externalities of life trouble us to no end. The news is filled with stories of crime and war, social media with narcissism and contorted views of reality, and the vast majority of the people we come across on the street are wallowing in some form of misery. We are the most prosperous and yet […]
- [Dedication](https://spencersekulin.net/2017/11/03/dedication/): Before a seafaring vessel is launched it is given a ceremony, a sending off as it begins its lifelong journey on the seas. It will not ever return to the dry dock it was born in, except perhaps to be dismantled, and as to where it shall go only providence knows. But what is known is that it will be going places, that it will toil upon the heaving seas, that it will bridge the distance between continents, peoples, even worlds. For the very purpose of a vessel is the journey. Its destination is merely an outcome. So it is, […]

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- [Music List](https://spencersekulin.net/music-list/): “When words fail, music speaks.“ William Shakespeare Music is, as Leo Tolstoy said, the shorthand of emotion. It speaks to each of us in a way that is completely unique to ourselves, and reaches a part of our hearts that nothing else can touch. Music is, to me, a companion of living, a salve for the mind and spirit in a troubled world, a wind that spurs the sails of creativity, and a friend that bears witness to the living of life. Life is not clean, nor is it easy, and music accompanies us through it all. A song reaches […]
- [Writing](https://spencersekulin.net/authors-corner/): Short Stories, Novellas, and Novels What Was Lost (2026) – Forthcoming Deathless (2026) – Forthcoming The Flowers of Sânziana (2026) – Forthcoming Song of the Sands – A Novel (2026) IN ORDER TO SAVE HIS SISTER, Lugh Ahearn has lied, thieved, and gambled his way across a continent. Now he finds himself in the lawless Frontier on a last-ditch effort, searching for the legends of the elusive Uluru tribes. But the Godstone, his final hope, drags him down a path of cataclysm and war. Whilst Lugh’s enemies vie for its power, Ku’Adsila, an Uluru blood sorceress and outlaw, has her own aims. […]
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- [Reading List](https://spencersekulin.net/book-list/): “Books are a uniquely portable magic.” Stephen King Books are transformational. They have the power to pull us up from the darkness and into the light. I am a firm believer that a good life requires good reading–whatever that may mean to you. Learning doesn’t end when we graduate, but neither does adventure. In the words painstakingly crafted by others, we can find ourselves and find joys unimaginable. These are the books that have changed my life. I highly recommend each of them. I have organized them into the following categories: Philosophy Meditations by Marcus Aurelius “The things you think […]
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- [About](https://spencersekulin.net/about-me/): Writer, medic, creator, coffee connoisseur, lifelong work in progress. My goal in life is live well—and to help others do the same. Here I share my thoughts and the ideas I come across. It is my sincere hope that some of it will prove useful to you. I also use this blog as my personal website for my writing, novels, short stories, and other creative ventures. Consult your physician before reading. Seriously. Lastly, to whoever is reading this now, I wish you a life full of growth, love, happiness, and wonderful experiences. You are worthy of those.
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